DIVORCE AGREEMENT
Dear American liberals, leftists, social progressives, socialists, Marxists, and Obama supporters, et.,al.:

We have stuck together since the late 1950's, but the whole of this latest election process has made me realize that I want a divorce.

 I know we have tolerated each other for many years for the sake of future generations, but sadly this relationship has run it's course.

Our two ideological sides of America can not and will not ever agree on what is right, so lets just end it on friendly terms.

We can smile and chalk it up to irreconcilable differences and go our own way.

Separation Terms:
Our two groups can equitable divide up the Country by landmass each taking a portion, that will be the difficult part, but I am sure the two sides can come to a friendly agreement.

After that it should be relatively easy! Our respective representatives can effortlessly divide the other assets since both sides have such distinct and separate tastes.

We don't like redistributive taxes so you can keep them, and you are welcome to the liberal judges and the ACLU.

 Since you hate guns and war, we will take the firearms, the cops, the NRA, and the military, and you can keep, Oprah, Michael Moore and Rosie O'Donnell.

We will keep Capitalism, the greedy Corporations, Pharmaceutical Companies, Wal-Mart and Wall street.

You can have your homeless, homeboys, hippies and illegal aliens. We will keep the hot alaskan hocky moms, greedy CEO's and rednecks. We will keep the Bible and give you NBC, and Hollywood.

You can make nice with Iran, Palestine, and we will retain the right to invade and hammer places that threaten us.

You can have the peaceniks, and war protesters. When our allies or our way of life is under assault we will help provide security.

We will keep our Judeo-Christian values, and you are welcome to Islam, Scientology, humanism and Shirley McClain, you can also have the U.N., but we will no longer be paying the bill.

We will keep the SUV's, pickup trucks, and oversized luxury cars.

You can take every Subaru station wagon you can find. You can have National Healthcare if you can find any practicing Doctors.

We will continue to believe health care is a luxury, not a right

We will keep the Battle hymn of the Republic, and the National Anthem, and I am sure you will be satisfied with, "Imagine", "I'd like to teach the world to sing", "Kum-ba-ya", and "We are the world".

We will practice , Trickle down economics and you can give, trickle up poverty a shot, you seem to like it so well.

Since it often offends you, we will keep our History, our name and our flag.

In the spirit of friendly parting I'll bet you ANWAR, which one of us will need help in,1 to 8 years